Feeling Helpless

The last two weeks could not have been more opposite. From one extreme to the other. Helplessness and family. Read the whole story in this blog post and watch the video.

The only foundation

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise – in God I trust and am not afraid. Psalm 56:3-4, NIV

I was able to experience firsthand during my safety training what it means to no longer have control. In moments like these there are no more securities, you have nothing to hold on to. Totally helpless. What can you hope for at that moment? The good in humanity?

At that moment I realized once again that my faith is the only thing that carries me through life. In moments of despair, fear and helplessness, we can put our trust in God. The God who has not withdrawn from the world, but lives in us, who is still active today, He’s approachable. What a promise. What is your anchor, your foundation? I encourage you to accept God's invitation to get involved with Him. He is the firm foundation, the safe anchor, the place of refuge.


A week ago I was on a 5-day HEAT course in the Bavarian Forest. HEAT stands for ‘Hostile Environment Awareness Training’. In addition to general behavior in unsafe regions, tips on what to always have with you, a basic course in emergency first aid, an excursion into explosive devices and orientation with map and compass, we were all of a sudden taken as hostages. With bags over our heads, we were thrown into a truck, had to kneel in the woods or lying tied up in a damp basement. Shooting alarm guns and screaming was all we heard from the environment.

I have never experienced anything like thsi and even if you know it’s just fake, I was still thinking about what I would do in such a situation. Absolute helplessness describes it pretty well. The only thing that gave me comfort in this situation was my faith. It is incredibly comforting to know that we are secure in Him and nothing happens without His consent.

All in all, the training challenged me enormously and left a very positive mark on me. A very good preparation, even though I hope and believe that I will never encounter a hostage situation like this.


On Wednesday, I went back to DMG to help with the preparations for the Spring Mission Festival. As soon as I arrived, I was warmly welcomed and not only once I got to hear: "We are so happy that you are finally able to leave." The DMG really is a family and I enjoy the days here very much.

Yesterday the big event took place and it was a real blessing. Great weather, lots of people and good conversations. So an extremely full week is behind me, but it has also been an incredible blessing.


I now have reached 70% of my donation goal which enables me to go out. Wow! Thank you guys so much. Thank you for making my ministry possible!

A week ago I was finally able to book my flight. Hallelujah! On July 9th I will fly to Kenya, which is actually really soon. I can't even imagine it yet, but I'm really looking forward to it.

What’s next?

I'm really exhausted from the last two weeks, but nevertheless I'm pushing through. I have a lot of appointments this week, a wedding on Saturday and next week I will be at Christival as a staff member. After that I will have 2 weeks of vacation, which I am really looking forward to.

With this being said, thank you for all your support, prayers and encouragement. God bless you,


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Pray for:


- For an amazing training. I get to learn a lot and develop a heart for Africa. Such a beautiful continent, so many things to discover.

- For amazing friendships, great conversations and role models in faith. For a really good time going with me to South Sudan.


- For a blessed farewell. It’s really hard for me to say goodbye and continue these friendships online. Pray for much strength.

- For a good start in South Sudan in 3 weeks. That we will arrive well and that everything goes smoothly. That we will be welcomed nicely and settle in quickly.